apologies

Remember that kid who stomped on my foot? We wrote apology poems and he wrote one for me. 

That thing after the PPS is a winky face. 

true story

I had patio dismissal duty last week when one of my students from last year came up to show me the water bottle she brought to school. 

Kid: What's Margaritaville?

Me: Ask your mom. 

Kid: Is it bad? I just saw it in the cabinet and grabbed it. 

I then, dying laughing, proceeded to text her parents this picture. 

showing what you know

The first two weeks of school we were leaning about matter. The different states, how it can change, etc. before moving on we took a quick quiz. 

I'm pretty sure she meant pencil...

new year

So I'm the worst. It's been forever since I posted. But to be fair, nothing has happened because I broke my foot 10 weeks ago like an dummy and couldn't do anything for awhile. However, that's about to change since it's a new school year and I have new ridiculous kids to quote. 

Last week I was walking around putting the kids backpack numbers on their name name tags. 

Kid: why are you putting hashtag 16 on my thing?

And then today a different kid said: what is this tic tac toe looking thing on my paper?

Me (laughing): that's a number sign. You need to put your number after it. 

Kid (unsure): ok. 

lesson learned

Me: Hey, you just stomped on my foot. 

Kid: It's not my fault, your foot was where I was walking. 

Me: No way man, my foot was there first and you took up my space with your foot. 

Kid: You know Ms. Ewing, I think you learned a valuable lesson today. You probably shouldn't wear flip flops to school. 

uh oh

Kid: how's your boyfriend?

Me: He's not my boyfriend, but he's good. I told him you've been calling me Queen Ewing, and that you brought me flowers the other day. He said he might have to come up and talk to you about that. 

Kid: (after he stopped laughing he got really serious.) Does he know I'm spending the night with you tomorrow at the lock in? He might get mad. 

confusion

Kid: I don't understand pinstagram. 

Me: That's not what it's called. 

Kid: I guess that's why I don't know how to pin stuff. 

instagram

Kid: I'm going to take a picture of you and put it on Instagram. 

Me: What will you tag it?

Kid: #BestTeacherEver #awesome #swag

Me: Swag?

Kid: Yeah. You've got swag. 

drinkers

We are studying plants right now and we did a science experiment where we put celery with one freshly cut end into vases with different colors using food coloring in order to see what would happen. I called each table group over one at a time to check it out and when I showed one group the bottoms of the red celery, this is what happened. 

Kid: It looks like blood!

Kid 2: Like a Bloody Mary!

Kid 3: No it doesn't, it looks like red wine.

Me: Wait, what? How do you know what a Bloody Mary is?

Kid 2: My mom likes them. 

getting older

Kid: (looking in an old yearbook) You look pretty much the same except you're getting a lot older. 

Me: How do you know I'm getting older?

Kid: (after looking back and forth at me and the yearbook) Well this mole has moved to over here. And you have those wrinkles there. 

thanksgiving, christmas, and my birthday also happened

So Rebecca and the crew came down for Thanksgiving and it was great! Mostly because we didn't travel to Houston, then Shreveport, and then Austin. In one car. With 5 adults (1 of which is giant sized), and 2 kids. All within a 4 day period. Don't get me wrong, I was sad not seeing my Aunt, Uncle and cousins. But man was I happy to only travel to one city. We made pies, went to the park every day, and generally had an awesome time.

Miles and I decided to include Rebecca on our usual photo shoot. She did pretty well for her first time.

Trees were decorated because this is what you do the day after Thanksgiving. On to Christmas!

Christmas was spent in Chicago like usual. It was so much fun!

This is the only picture I took from my birthday. Probably the best birthday card I have ever received. Thanks kiddo!

That basically brings us to present day. Lots of school work for my masters class, teaching, and trying to have some sort of a life. I promise to do a better job of updating this. And when that doesn't actually happen...I apologize now.

halloween

I'm aware it's March. I'm aware you probably don't care about my Halloween anymore. But, I don't care. I worked super hard on my costume and I want to show you! Plus I have some cute pictures of the nephews I know you want to see.

I like Halloween...but I'm not a huge fan. I always feel ridiculous in costumes. Now as a kid of course this was the best holiday ever. Mostly because of all the free candy I got. This summer I was thinking that Halloween would be a blast with Miles, so I booked a ticket. Not long after that he said he wanted me to be Mary Poppins and he was going to be Bert with the band on his back. How can you say no to that? So I got to work. with some awesome Goodwill finds and some DIY, my costume came out pretty awesome! Rebecca also did an awesome job with Miles' costume!

For the hat I got black spray paint, daises and cherries from Hobby Lobby, and found the hat on Amazon. After spray painting, I super glued the flowers and cherries in the exact same way Mary Poppins hat was.

For the sash and bow tie for the shirt I bought different ribbons, hair clips (for the bow tie), and iron on letters. After a ton of gluing and ironing the sash was almost finished! It finished it off by folding the extra ribbons in half to make the circular bow at the end and topped it off with a gigantic white button from my grandma's button stash.

Finished product with Bert and the penguin waiter!

It was so cute. When I came upstairs dressed as Mary, Miles was so excited and got to shy! He couldn't even talk, he just looked at me with the biggest smile on his face.

It was snowing/raining/hailing/sleeting depending on the hour that day so we only lasted about 10 minutes before Miles was cold and wanted to go home. I was grateful because even with a jacket on, I was freezing! My hat kept getting blown off because of the insanely strong winds, so my hands out to be out of my jacket the whole time. They hurt they were so cold!

The rest of the trip was a lot of fun! It was spent playing with Miles and Atticus and hanging out with Michael and Rebecca. You wouldn't know it though because I only took pictures with the kids.

Obviously my photo shoots had to include Atticus. He will come to love them just as much as I'm sure Miles does!

m.i.a.

I know, I know. You've been dying to hear all about Halloween, Christmas and my birthday, but you'll have to wait. I'm continuing my laziness when I'm not working or doing stuff for my masters class. Until then, enjoy these two quotes from this week. 

Kid Walking to Spanish: I've been waiting my entire life to learn how to say fart in Spanish. I hope today is the day!

It's almost the 100th day of school and we always write about what we will be like as 100 year olds, and then make a portrait of what we will look like. Beforehand, we discuss what we know about old people. 

Kid 1: I know they always smell good. 

Kid 2: yeah, like cough drops and pills. 

Me: What? What do pills smell like?

Kid 2: I don't know, but that's just what my grandma smells like!

reaching perfection

Kid: All I need is for someone to sew my mouth shut and then I'll be perfect.

Me: Why would that make you perfect?

Kid: You know me Ms. Ewing. You know I talk too much.

i get it, i'm still single

I dropped my kids off at Spanish on Friday and ran in to some kids in my class 2 years ago:

Kid 1: Are you married yet?

Me: Nope.

Kid 2: Still? Man. You weren't married when we were in second grade and you still aren't married?!

Me: Nope. Sorry ladies, I don't know what to tell you.

Kid 2: Remember when I told you that you should marry my gerbil because it's cute and fuzzy? He's still available if you want to marry him! You probably should....I can't believe you aren't married yet!

Me: (walking away) Thanks for making me feel better about my life!

Kid 1: Anytime Ms. Ewing!

The very next day a girl from my class last year came up at recess and told me she was telling the lacrosse coach that came to help out with PE the past few days that he should date me. Her exact words were, "I told him he should be your boyfriend! I said you were pretty and he's a boy so he should ask you out!" 

Good lord. These kids are going to kill me. Maybe I should take up the first girls offer to marry her gerbil.

groceries

In the forest the first week of school, I was working on my grocery list.

Kid: What are you doing?

Me: I need to go to the grocery store this weekend so I'm working on my grocery list.

Kid: Woah.

Me: What?

Kid: That's a lot of food you're going to buy. I guess you haven't gone to the store all summer.

all white girls look alike

When we were in the forest earlier this year this conversation happened:

Kid: You and Ms. Moran look alike!

Me: Really? I mean, we're both girls...and have blonde hair.

Kid: Yeah. But you also both have really big noses.

At this point the girl she was with started giggling and they both ran off. Thanks kid.

authentic vs. african

Remember this awesome kid? She was one of my favorite, and always had something redonk to say. Well luckily she says hi to me at recess whenever we're out there at the same time. I was wearing a Willie Nelson shirt when this conversation happened:

Kid: I have that shirt too!

Me: Yeah, well mines more authentic. 

Kid: What does that mean? Like it's African? Is that what you did this summer? They have those shirts in Africa?

kid quotes are back!

I've been meaning to update with the ridiculous things my kids have been saying this year....but I just haven't had the time! I'm back in school getting my masters and librarian certification which has taken any free time I have away. (Conferences, report cards, and other regular work stuff hasn't helped this problem.) Any free time I do have has been spent trying to have a life. 

ANYWAYS, I will be updating over the next few days some things that have already been said. But let's start with a sweet one. 

Today at recess a boy from last year came up to me:

Kid: I have a question for you Ms. Ewing.

Me: What's up?

Kid: Why are you so beautiful today? (huge smile)

Me: (laughing) What?

Kid: You're so beautiful today!

At this point he gave me a hug and ran off. Apparently I am too beautiful to be at school. I'll take it! (It's better than what another kid said earlier this year. You'll probably enjoy that quote better.)

las vegas

I realized I never posted about my Vegas trip! We went to see Britney Spears, but used Katie and her upcoming wedding as an excuse for a bachelorette party. It was my first time there and I couldn't wait! We got in Friday afternoon and walked around, being touristy and going to all of the hotels and seeing that fountain that's in every movie about Vegas. It's weird seeing it all in person.

Heading to the airport!

 Where we were staying.

 Our view.

 Walking around the strip.

Obligatory hotel pictures. (Sorry)

 Waiting for us! From one of Katie's friends.

 It took awhile....

Of course we gambled after dinner, and I actually won! The slot machines and I became good friends, and I'm sure they miss me. 

 Watch out Vegas, I'm coming back for you!

The next day we spent the day at the pool. I always heard you had to get to the pool early to get chairs...I didn't really believe them. We got there at like 9 or 10 and there were NO chairs left. None. We batted our eyelashes and one of the workers found some somewhere and carried them to the pool for us. We spent they day laughing, meeting ridiculous people, and listening to awesome music from the dj. 

That night we got ready and headed to Planet Hollywood to see the one and only Britney! We were so excited!

We found a place to eat and sat and ordered. It was hot in there and I started not feeling well, and getting light headed. I jokingly (so I thought) said "I don't feel well. I think I'm going to faint." Well, I spoke too soon. Next thing I know I'm laying on the ground looking up at my friends in the lap of a random lady holding ice and wet towels to my neck and head. They called the EMS who immediately asked how much I had to drink that day. Fair question, we are in Vegas after all, but I only had 3 beers, hours earlier. They checked all my vitals, and everything but my blood pressure (it was some crazy low number) looked good. He said I could go to Britney, and I would faint once I stood back up. Or, go with them to the hospital to get fluids in me. I didn't know what to do, so I went with them. 

Fully embarrassed, annoyed I would miss Britney, and feeling guilty because Sheri came with me, we headed to the scariest hospital I've ever been to. I didn't want Sheri to come with me, because that meant she would miss Britney. However, once we got there, I was glad she was with me. It was like a psych ward in there! Lots of crazies screaming nonsense. All tests came back normal, other than me being super dehydrated. Right before I left the nurse came in to do an EKG and all I could think about was more money I would have to spend, and how tired I was. (For those of you that haven't fainted before, it takes a lot out of you.) I asked her why she had to do it, her response? "You know all those news stories you hear about football players just dropping dead? I'm doing this to make sure that doesn't happen to you." Fair enough. She did the test, and sent us on our merry way. 

We got back to the hotel, and tried to sleep for about 4 hours before leaving to go back to Austin. I didn't see Britney, but the rest of the trip was a lot of fun! Until we meet again, Vegas.